It's Day One

We prayed and prayed for the opportunity for me to have more time at home, yet as I said goodbye to my students on Friday and my staff and teammates yesterday, I was an emotional wreck. I knew this was the best decision and was such an incredible opportunity for our family. But in the moment, all I could think about was how this could very well be my last class of students. I know I will one day go back to work full-time, but that doesn't mean I'd be in a classroom again.

There's just something about being with the same 20-30 kids every day for, most of their day, for an entire school year. The relationships and bonds you build are so important and will hopefully impact them for the rest of their lives. I cried as "my children" sobbed on me Friday, "I love you Mrs. Curran," "Thank you for loving us all equally, even when we weren't good," "You were like a second mom to me. Thank you for being someone I could trust." Their words were so sincere and powerful. The final five minutes of that last day were just beautiful and many special moments were shared with all of my students.

Then Monday, I said goodbye to my 4th grade team. I am beyond fortunate that I will still be at the same school, but as we said goodbye, we knew next year would be different. I wouldn't be there everyday. I wouldn't be swapping stories about how to handle different student situations. Our relationships are bound to change.

I drove away from Harmony with watery eyes, knowing the next time I returned, I would not be a teacher. I drove away from the building where my career began. And as I drove, saddened to be saying goodbye, a song was playing in the background, "It's day one of the rest of my life. I'm marching on to the beat of a brand new drum. Yeah, here I come. The future has begun. Day one"

It's day one! No, this was not an easy decision, but this was the right decision; it was what my heart and soul needed. My sadness passed and I realized how fortunate our family is that I will be able to take advantage of this new opportunity. Being a mom is not always easy. We have to make tough decisions. Working moms often wish they could be at home, feeling conflicted for not putting 100% of our attention on our children. Stay-at-home moms long for that adult interaction you get at a workplace. It is so difficult to find a balance. Regardless of our situations, we all have one thing in common -- we want what is best for our children and families and will do whatever it takes to provide that. I am thankful that this "day one of the rest of my life" begins today. I am so excited for our family's future!

Be Kinder than Necessary

Today was the last day of school. My last day of teaching for at least the next year, maybe longer. As I prepared to say goodbye to my kiddos at school, we finished one of our favorite read alouds of the year. In our book, the main character was graduating fifth grade. These were the words his principal spoke to them:

“Be kinder than necessary. What a marvelous line, isn’t it? Kinder than necessary. Because it’s not enough to be kind. One should be kinder than needed. Why I love that line, that concept, is that it reminds me that we carry with us the very choice of kindness. Such a simple thing. A nice word of encouragement given when needed. An act of friendship. A passing smile…children, what I want to impact to you today is an understanding of the value of that simple thing called kindness. And that’s all I want to leave you with today. If every single person in this room made it a rule that wherever you are, whenever you can, you will try to act a little kinder than is necessary – the world really would be a better place. And if you do this, if you act just a little kinder than is necessary, someone else, somewhere, someday may recognize in you, in every single one of you, the face of God.”

As I read these words, I couldn't help but get choked up. I looked out at the sweet 20-some faces staring back at me. I saw their futures -- would some grow to be professionals? Artists? Doctors or nurses? What would they be like in high school? Would they get caught up in poor decision making? I wanted to pour all my experiences and knowledge into their heads and save them from the pain the world can cause.

I saw some of my students tearing up with me, while others asked, "Why are you crying, Mrs. Curran?"

I smiled and said, "Because those words were so beautiful. Did you hear what Mr. Tushman just said? He was speaking to all of us. He told us, that if we are kinder than we need to be, you will show someone the face of God. You will show them what it means to be loved by God. That's a lot of power we all posses if we are kinder than necessary."

I hope my students truly heard these words with their hearts today. This was a lesson I tried to teach all year and the fact that our book articulated it so beautifully was just moving. I hope if I taught them anything in their 4th grade year, I taught them the importance of loving one another. Of loving everyone. I hope as they face life, somewhere in the back of their minds, they might remember a teacher, many years ago, who taught us to be kinder than necessary. I hope you, my boys, will learn that lesson too. It's not an easy one. It's one I have to work on every single day. But if we are kinder than necessary, no matter what the circumstance, we have the chance to shine Christ's light. Let’s all be a little kinder than necessary so that the world will see the face of God in us.

Summer Lovin'

There may still be five days left of work for me, but we have definitely started celebrating summer  here!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy 1/2 Birthday

May 19th has become one of my favorite dates because it now represents so much to our little family. May 19th was the day our lives officially changed forever. May 19th was the day my soul felt true joy after so many months and years of heartache. May 19th is the day I felt like I became a mother...

It seems like so long ago and just like yesterday all at once. I can remember tiptoeing to the bathroom well before the sun was up. I can remember the pounding of my heart and shaking of my hands. And I remember the shocking joy and disbelief as I read that one magical word I had been waiting my whole life to read, "Pregnant."

And so, I celebrate the miracle of you two on this two year anniversary of so many prayers being answered. Not just that though, May 19th is your half birthday, little ones! So today, we celebrate eighteen months...ONE AND A HALF YEARS old! How can that be?! How are my little three pound peanuts now closer to two then you are to one year old? You boys are such a joy to watch grow and explore the world around you.

So, for old time's sake...

 Wiley

• Size: we will get an official weight next week at your check up. I'm guessing you're around 27 pounds and a little over 30 inches tall. You fit comfortably in size 4 diapers. 18 month clothing is fitting your pretty perfectly right now. 
• You are still such an excellent sleeper. Bedtime is typically between 7 and 7:30 and you don't get out of bed until 9:00 AM. However, this is starting to change. You are waking a little earlier than you used to and starting to get out of your bed around 8:00 AM now. You are happy to lay in bed and babble with Ryan for quite some time though. Once I hear, "Milk," and "Hi," I know you're about ready to get up and begin your day.
• You can say 13 words: mama, dada, banana (ba-ba), milk (mel), more (muh), ball (bah...sometimes we hear the "l" sound at the end), down, hi, doggie (duh-duh), outside (ow-sigh), bye-bye (buh-bye), shoes (sh-zz), socks. You also sign please when asking for something and thank you (when reminded) after receiving what you want. You blow kisses when we ask you to say, "I love you." I could burst into tears when you "say," "I love you," without being asked and just because you want us to know! You also have one "sentence," "more milk."
• You have always been such a fabulous eater, but that is starting to change. You will now shake your head if you don't want something or simply throw it on the floor. Breakfast is our best bet for a good, solid meal. We'll take what we can get during lunch and dinner! Part of the problem seems to be your independence. You want to do everything for yourself. So, if we're eating something that isn't finger foods, you are a little more stubborn. You understand how to use a spoon and fork, but aren't always successful in scooping the food onto your utensil.
• You are such an observant, curious little problem solver. You will sit and tinker with things, trying to figure out how they work. I watched you open and close a drawer over and over again, as you sat below it, stood up to look  from the side, and then got on your tiptoes examining from the top, trying to figure out how it worked. You like to take things apart and line the pieces up. When things are stuck or out of reach, you find a way to get them. I remember watching as you'd bring your toy bin over to the couch (before you were tall enough to climb on yourself). You flipped the bin over, stood on top of it, and climbed up onto the couch! I like watching your creativity developing; it amazes me. 
• You still love music and now love to sing! "All I Want is You," is your favorite. All we have to do is sing, "If I were a flower growin' wild and free," your face lights up and you start humming the tune to the song! If (on the rare occasion) we don't have music playing, you'll walk up to my ipad and make this panting sound, which we now means, "music!"
• You are a great listener and follow a lot of our directions, (Wiley sit down, Wiley put that down, clean up your toys please, etc.). But as well as you follow directions, you seem to also have an equal part mischievousness to yourself. "Wiley, don't open that door please," is often followed by your slowly walking back to the door, looking at us with a grin that says, "I heard what you said, I know I shouldn't do this, but watch me open the door anyway."
• I have said from the time you were an infant, that you have always seemed to be a sweet, sensitive soul. This is still true! You are really sweet with your brother and take care of him. If he's crying or upset, you will hug him or bring him his milk to comfort him. I love your caring heart!

Ryan

• Size: we will get an official weight next week at your check up. I'm guessing you're around 25 pounds and probably right at 30 inches tall. You fit comfortably in size 4 diapers. You are in the awkward in-betweeny stages of clothing - 12 months is becoming a little snug on you, but 18 month is still a little big (especially the pants - they fall right off you).
• You are still such an excellent sleeper. Bedtime is typically between 7 and 7:30 and you don't get out of bed until 9:00 AM. However, this is starting to change. You are waking a little earlier than you used to and starting to get out of your bed around 8:00 AM. You are happy to lay in bed and babble with Ryan for quite some time though. Once I hear, "Milk," "Hi," and the sounds of a baby boy jumping up and down in his crib, I know you're about ready to get up for the day!
• You can say 14 words now: hi, mama, dada, more (muh), ball (bah...sometimes we hear the "l" sound at the end), banana (ba-ba or na-na), down, milk (mel), doggie (doh-doh), bye-bye (buh-bye), shoes (shzz), outside (ow-sigh), socks, and cheese (ch-zz). You also sign please when asking for something and thank you after receiving what you want. You blow kisses when we ask you to say, "I love you." I could burst into tears when you "say," "I love you," without being asked and just because you want us to know! You have used a couple "sentences" now: "Mama, ball, please (sign please)," and "more milk, please (sign please)."
• You have always been such a fabulous eater, but that is starting to change. You will now shake your head if you don't want something or simply throw it on the floor. Breakfast is our best bet for a good, solid meal. We'll take what we can get during lunch and dinner! You seem to like to copy your big brother too. So, if we can avoid you seeing him refusing to be fed, you will be a little more cooperative. But the second you see Wiley doesn't want the food, you too suddenly refuse to eat, stinker! You are also very independent too, wanting to do everything for yourself. So, if we're eating something that isn't finger foods, you are a little more stubborn. You understand how to use a spoon and fork, but aren't always successful in scooping the food onto your utensil.
• You are a little more cautious than your curious brother. Instead of trying new things out first, you watch Wiley very carefully. If he is successful, then "monkey see, monkey do." However, if Wiley's idea doesn't seem to work or if he got hurt, you turn back to what you were doing and decide it's not worth the risk. 
• You still seem to be the comedian of our family. You know what to do to make us laugh and continue to do it to keep us giggling. The faces you make seem like you know exactly what you're doing. 
• You still love music. If (on the rare occasion) we don't have music playing, you'll walk up to my ipad and make this panting sound, which we now means, "music!" Your newest, go-to dance move, is a cool head nod. 
• Bathtime is still one of your favorite times of the day! You especially love when Daddy dumps water on your head.
• You are a really great listener and follow most of our directions (Ryan sit down, Ryan put that down, clean up your toys please, etc.). Every night we can count on your to clean up all your and your brother's toys.

I had the day off today, so we were busy celebrating your half-birthday all day. We started the morning off with a quick (relatively speaking -- nothing is too quick when toting two toddlers!) shopping trip and then met Zsu Zsu and Daddy at Paka's office for a lunch date. From there, it was back home for your afternoon nap. We ended the evening going out to eat with your great uncle and aunt who were in town from Pennsylvania for business.

I was so happy to be home with you boys today; it got me very excited for our summer and next school year, knowing I will soon have so much more time with you boys! It is such a privilege to be your all's mommy. I love watching you grow and having a chance to see the world through your innocent, wide-eyes.