Rise

The past two months I have found myself in a good place with some bad days, while back in the fall, I was in a bad place with good days. Unfortunately, Sunday (and moments since then) has found me in a bad / angry place.

Sunday, I was met....or shall we say, blindsided....by the news of another pregnant person. Because there was no warning, I was so overcome by my own sadness. Throughout this journey, church has been a place of peace and encouragement for me. And so, to add salt to the wound, this person is a member of my church. As if my sister-in-laws weren't enough, the one place where there were no babies or pregnancies, the one place of peace, is now tarnished with someone else who is pregnant.

Sunday afternoon, on my comatose-like-state drive home, I heard this song, which was so comforting to me:

Each of these lines and verses seemed so perfectly fitting for me. "Sometimes my heart is on the ground and hope is nowhere to be found; love is a figment I once knew and yet I hold on to what I know is true." Yes, I have those days of feeling hopeless in this journey, but even on those days, I hold on to my faith and my trust in God.

"From this trouble I have found and this rubble on the ground I will rise, cause He who is in me is greater than I will ever be and I will rise." Sunday found me down, but I have to remind myself, that I will rise. And I won't rise because of my own strength, but through God's strength, I will overcome this small bump, and this journey, and I will rise.