Well, today has been the most painful day physically thus far. The shots and pills did exactly what they were supposed to, but to a fault. So, you are not on your way yet, but I am still dealing with the side effects as if you were. I can handle the pain and will tough it out. But the worst part about it is each time I feel pain, I'm reminded that it didn't work this month; that this pain is all for nothing this month. And I know that's not completely true; each step (good and bad) is a step towards you. I know that even this painful part of our journey is all apart of the bigger plan. But it still hurts (physically and emotionally).
I heard a new song today while trying to push through this physical and emotional pain, Need You Now:
So, in the midst of this pain today, I cry out to God, I need you now. And I know He hears me and I know He is comforting us through this journey to you. I find myself thinking,"I want to believe there's beauty here," even in this pain. And I know you are the beauty, I just wish you were here now! And so I cry out to God, I need you now, as I try to find the beauty today. And as the lyrics also stated, so often I have wondered how we got here and how we will ever get to where we are going. There are days like today where I have cried out to God just asking Him to take this pain and journey away. But I know it is all for His perfect plan. I know our miracle is waiting for us. And I am excited for the day that God reveals you to us. I am excited for the day that Keal sees firsthand God's hand move in our lives.
Today I praise God that He has heard my every cry out to Him. Today I praise God that through each cry He picks me up and gives me strength. I praise God that every time I whisper, I need you now, He is always there pulling us through along this beautiful journey to you.
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